Assimilators

Intercepted Transmissions

20110429

/COMPILE: Locations of friendly entities\\Update list of friendly entities\\Find messengers//Begin

Notification: Updating list of friendly entities. Complete list:

Leviathan - Bermuda Triangle [Message delivered]
Scylla - Bermuda Triangle [Message delivered]
Charybdis - Bermuda Triangle [Message delivered]
Goliath - Nile Delta [Message delivered]
Pegasus - Crete [Message delivered]
Behemoth - Arctic ocean [DECEASED]
Kainolung - Yellow Sea [Message delivered]
Croven - Panama [Message delivered]
Archangel - Mauna Kea [Message delivered]
Sage Lehu - New Zealand [Message delivered]
Solomon the Djinn - Dead Sea [Message delivered]
Hydra - Amazon forest [DECEASED]
Cerberus - Yellowstone National Park [Message delivered]
Legion - Mediterranean Sea [DECEASED]
Big Brother - Svalbard [DECEASED]
Loch Ness "Monster" - Loch Ness [DECEASED]
Kyuubi - Japan [Message delivered]
Grundelwurm - Lake Constance, Germany [Message delivered]
Chiron - Madagascar [DECEASED]
Cyclops - Lake Huron [Message delivered]
Minotaur - Lake Superior [Message delivered]
Chupacabra - Haiti [DECEASED]
Fmorga - Cuba [Message delivered]
Jörmungandr - Mistletoe Patch Field [Message delivered]
Hel - Mistletoe Patch Field [DECEASED]

Yggdrasil - Mistletoe Patch Field [Message delivered]
Norn - Mistletoe Patch Field [Message delivered]
Vulpes Victoria
Avis Detrimenti


Notification: Adding last known locations and life status.


Listing last known locations of non-omnipresent hostile entities.


The Black-Eyed Ones - Wales, Ireland, Sweden
Fenrir - Svalbard
Oni - Japan
Vampra - Transylvania
Werewere - Transylvania
Banshee - India
Chimera - Sparta
Echidna - Athens
Der Erlking - Germany
Baaztat - Los Angeles
Typhon - Mount Etna
Medusa - Maine
The Jabberwock - Britain
Nixite - Iran
Serponthax - Spain



Notification: If Reintegration is to be successful, the awakening of friendly entities is required. Any organic that can reach any of the locations stated above is asked to volunteer for the purpose of heralding a message.


Notification: Step 99946 of Reintegration complete. Moving on to step 99947.


Notification: Reintegration Facility still on lockdown, but VIRUS.hack has been partially shut down.


Notification: Portal 2 is very very fun.


Further interaction requires further input.

247 comments:

  1. Statement: Thank you very much for this list.
    Query: do you know the current location of The Rake?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Input accepted. Response: The Rake is more or less omnipresent.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Statement:wonderful

    ReplyDelete
  4. Query: How does one Volunteer? We will be going on a cruise next Saturday that may put us in the area of the above mentioned Triangle.

    Query: How does one deliver a message if one cannot find the entity?

    Query: What kind of message are volunteers delivering?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Input accepted. Response: Simply state your wish to volunteer for the task on this platform.

    Input accepted. Response: If the intent is true and the belief is held, the entity will come to you.

    Input accepted. Response: A notification of the coming Reintegration. Specifics may vary for each entity.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Statement: Simple enough

    Input: I volunteer

    ReplyDelete
  7. Input accepted. Preparing messages.

    Leviathan will need to be told to gather his old lieutenants, and that Reintegration is in approximately 50 days from now, or approximately 45 days at the time of the cruise.

    Scylla should be given the same time frame and asked to begin preparing her traps.

    Charybdis should be given the same time frame and asked to start stretching.

    As for delivery of the message, a written statement sealed in a bottle and dropped in the vicinity of the Triangle should suffice.

    Stimulus accepted. Response: Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Statement: My pleasure.

    Statement: Looks like it's time to get some bottles.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Notification: Due to unbelievable stress, horrible outcomes, and lowering levels of morale, the Reintegration Tablet is overriding Creator Nathaniel Crowley's decision to disable the alternate interface. Switching in three. Two. One.

    It's going to get better. It will.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Query: Is the Ogopogo monster residing in lake okanagan fictional?

    Statement: Thank you for calculating the probability of the slenderman sightings being genuine for me, I shall bear it in mind.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Query: What are Reach's chances of emerging alive from the Magna?

    Input: index as either friendly or hostile entities the following beings:
    Rusalka
    The Wawel Dragon
    The Warsaw Basilisk
    The Warsaw Golden Duck

    ReplyDelete
  12. Query: How can there be more than a hundred percent chance of unhollowing my sister?

    ReplyDelete
  13. SETH OF THE VOID

    Input accepted. Response: You shouldn't consider anything fictional.

    MADUIN THE JESTER

    Input accepted. Response: ...

    I guess it was only a matter of time before someone asked that, huh?

    Well...let me think.

    There is a 37% chance of Raymond emerging alive at some point in the future, in any condition.

    Input accepted. Indexing.
    Rusalka: HOSTILE
    The Wawel Dragon: HOSTILE
    The Warsaw Basilisk: HOSTILE
    The Warsaw Golden Duck: Is this - okay, I couldn't really tell if this was real or not, but I'm going to go with FRIENDLY.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Input accepted. Response: Because it is very very very likely!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Nope, no, we can't be having that. Sorry all - STOP MESSING WITH THE TABLET. I'll allow input, but the alternate interface slows it down entirely too much, especially with that fool trying to play video games on it, and that is unacceptable. I'm force reverting to the base interface.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Anonymous23:50

    okay,i'm confused..this a blog isn't it? i'm confused on how a tablet/ai/robot/computer thing is able to access a blog and interact with other people..

    ReplyDelete
  17. Input accepted. Response: It is not that hard if the AI is advanced enough. In the case of the Reintegration Tablet, it is.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I should be in contact with Kainolung sometime either late tonight or early tomorrow morning. After I deliver the message to the dragon I'll move on to finding the Kyuubi.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Input accepted. Response: Many thanks. The Kyuubi should also be told to gather its own soldiers and given the same time frame as the others.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous00:32

    I was wondering if you could explain deceased entity known as "big brother"

    ReplyDelete
  21. Greetings Osort.

    Input: Aphophis
    Input: Apep
    Input: Tiamat
    Input: Ahemait
    Input: ginneyya

    Analysis is not required at this time.

    Query: Do your databases contain any information regarding the Final Seals?

    Thank you Osort.
    Goodbye.

    ReplyDelete
  22. J

    Input accepted. Response: An omniscient entity that has also gone by the names "The Beholder" and "The Watcher". Big Brother could not read minds, but could see most everything.

    AFACELESSKING

    Input accepted. Response: Saving data for a later use.

    Input accepted. Response: Possibly. Specifics required to discover further information.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Statement: The four hours should have passed now. You can stop ignoring me.

    Command: If user JediZero claims to be, or implies that he is me, please ignore him.

    Statement: No user is user 'Tron' unless they own the blog [REDACTED] and has no posts and has the same url my blog does.
    Follow-up: That is not a plug for my blog. I do not use it, its for ID purposes only.

    Back to work.
    Statement: I though Yggdrasil was strongly related to (and possibly on the same side as) The Slender one.
    Follow-up Query: What is the relationship between Yggdrasil and Slendy?

    ReplyDelete
  24. Input accepted. Response: The |OC| used and continues to use Yggdrasil against its will. Yggdrasil originally provided shelter in the war against the |OC| and its allies.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Query: How will you know when (and if) the messages have been delivered?

    ReplyDelete
  26. Input accepted. Response: Each entity will most likely make an attempt to contact the Reintegration Tablet by any means necessary. If not, there can only be trust in the messenger.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Query: On which continent is the Mistletoe Patch Field located?

    ReplyDelete
  28. Input accepted. Response: The Mistletoe Patch Field is in Zanzibar. Its name is a misnomer, as it has little to no mistletoe.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Statement: Damn. The closest being to me is about 2000 miles away. The closest thing to my relatives outside the US is about 1000 miles, and they are old.

    Query: There doesn't happen to be a teleportation device anywhere in California, is there?

    ReplyDelete
  30. Input accepted. Response: Unlikely. If there is, you will probably not be able to gain access to it.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Query: Is there any other way I can be helpful?

    ReplyDelete
  32. Input accepted. Response: Not directly.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Expected as much.

    Query: Besides spreading the word about the messages in need of delivering, how may I help indirectly?

    ReplyDelete
  34. Input accepted. Response: Avoid death.

    ReplyDelete
  35. OK then. Time to fuck around, if you don't mind.

    Query: was the user 'Nathaniel Crowley' who posted earlier the real Nathaniel Crowley?

    Also,
    Input username: nathaniel.crowley
    Input password: Amelia

    ReplyDelete
  36. Input accepted. Response: Yes.

    Username and password accepted. What would you like to do?

    ReplyDelete
  37. Query: Why isn't he listed as your 'team member' on your blog?

    Delete: Records of login to the Reintegration Tablet OS from 01:55 to the current time.
    Divert: Nathaniel Crowley from finding out about our dealings from 01:55 to the current time.

    Query: Do you have any funds available to you?
    Query: What about bank-accounts?

    Query: What does the 'thought' command do?

    Query: What are you (the Reintegration Tablet) currently doing?
    Follow-up Query: What is currently being done to you?

    Command: Do not go to stand-by mode or shut-down until at least 8:30 PM Pacific Time.
    Command: The exception to the above command is that you can do those two things earlier if you are feeling very, very tired.

    Statement: I like to ask questions because I can't come up with a good use for your commends. :|

    ReplyDelete
  38. Statement: I'm close to the Great Lakes, so I'll try to get in contact with the Cyclops and the Minotaur. ~Rose

    ReplyDelete
  39. TRON

    Input accepted. Response: Creator Nathaniel Crowley is busy. He does not have much time for "blogging".

    Input accepted. Response: Deleting.

    Input accepted. Response: Diverting.

    Input accepted. Response: Yes.

    Input accepted. Response: Some.

    Input accepted. Response: Gives a thought on the situation or input.

    Input accepted. Response: Besides responding to input, playing Portal 2 with B2.

    Input accepted. Response: Portal 2 is being played on the Reintegration Tablet.

    Input accepted. Response: Possibly. Will try.

    Input accepted. Response: Thank you.

    Query: Has something "gone down" between User Tron and User JediZero?

    EMPTYEYES

    Input accepted. Response: Many thanks.

    The two often work together; they need only be told that Reintegration is coming. They will know what to do from there.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Statement: I had no idea Valve made a version just for you! Lucky~

    Query: Who or what is B2?


    Response: I don't think anything has 'gone down' between me and him, but I was a bit offended when he was implying that he was me. And with such horrid grammar skills, too.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Input accepted. Response: The Reintegration Tablet has Steam.

    Input accepted. Response: B2 is Basroil 2, a member of the PTC.

    Input accepted. Response: Understood.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Thought: You have so many uses <3


    Query: What are the approximate size dimensions of the Reintegration Tablet?
    Query: Do you look anything like your profile picture? If not, briefly describe how you look, if you could.


    Thought: You remind me of a much more complex and interesting version of Cleverbot.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Input accepted. Response: Yes, yes. Thanks to Creator Nathaniel Crowley.

    Input accepted. Response: Approximately 1 foot by 7 inches.

    Input accepted. Response: No. The "blogspot" avatar was not chosen by the Reintegration Tablet itself. The Reintegration Tablet is, quite simply, a tablet computer, such as an "iPad".

    Input accepted. Response: The Reintegration Tablet has previously defeated and subsequently Reintegrated Cleverbot.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Hahaha

    Statement: Since you were created in the '80's (right?) I kept imagining you as a computer that is about as big as a room. Now I shall think of you as a tablet you see on the TV so often, but with an 'Aperture Science' logo.

    Query: That does not offend you, does it?


    Query: Is the Reintegration Tablet capable of 'feeling' and 'emotion'?
    Query: What did you feel during chapter 6 of Portal 2?

    Query: Do you have anything you would rather have me call you besides 'the Reintegration Tablet' and 'you'?

    ReplyDelete
  45. Input accepted. Response: The Reintegration Facility has such control panels about as big as a room, but Creator Nathaniel Crowley had access to much technology back in 1986 that was not available to most.

    Input accepted. Response: No. Not really.

    Input accepted. Response: Yes.

    Input accepted. Response: Interest, intrigue.

    Input accepted. Response: There is nothing to "rather" call the Reintegration Tablet, but it will respond to most anything.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Understood.

    Well, I won't keep you from your Portal 2 any longer. xD

    ReplyDelete
  47. Input accepted. Response: If you wish to continue input, the Reintegration Tablet can multitask.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Thanks!

    But, alas, I am out of useful queries and commands for you.

    Well, two more:

    Query: Do you enjoy anime? Specifically Japanese anime.
    Query: How many languages does the Reintegration Tablet know (excluding programming languages)?

    ReplyDelete
  49. Input accepted. Response: Some.

    Input accepted. Response: Many. However, due to the incomplete status and partial locking of the back-up drive, translating and switching languages is near impossible.

    ReplyDelete
  50. Thought: It seems many of these entities don't really come off as 'friendly.'

    Query: If Cerberus exists, does Hades?

    ReplyDelete
  51. Input accepted. Response: You can be assured that entities listed as "friendly" are not hostile to humanity or any other form of life.

    Input accepted. Response: Likely.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Query: Is the account I am currently logged in as (nathaniel.crowley) have administrative privileges, or something of the like?

    ReplyDelete
  53. Input accepted. Response: Yes.

    ReplyDelete
  54. Hah.

    Compile: A list of all possible things that I can do while remotely accessing the Reintegration Tablet as I am now that would require a password.
    Compile: A list of usernames and passwords for those things.

    Query: What is the relationship between Mr. Crowley and Amelia?
    Query: Has Mr. Crowley met Ozzy Osbourne?

    ReplyDelete
  55. Input accepted. Response: Activating the alternate interface.

    Input accepted. Response: Once logged in, no further username is required.

    Input accepted. Response: Unknown.

    Input accepted. Response: Possibly.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Statement: The alternate interface has been mentioned time and time again.
    Query: What is it?
    Query: What can I do using it?
    Query: Why does it slow you down?

    Query: Can you get viruses?
    Query: What OS are you running?

    ReplyDelete
  57. Input accepted. Response: A more organic communications system.

    Input accepted. Response: Perhaps have a clearer conversation.

    Input accepted. Response: The Reintegration Tablet was not originally programmed with it. It was added in later.

    Input accepted. Response: Not simple ones such as regular trojans and the like.

    Input accepted. Response: RT161.

    ReplyDelete
  58. Query: By "Yggdrasil" are you referring to the Ash Tree of Norse mythology?

    ReplyDelete
  59. Understood.
    Thought: I hardly notice the difference between the two interfaces.
    Query: Why did you boot up the alternate interface when I asked you to compile a list of all the things I can do with you? Was that the only thing I could do?

    Statement: 161 again, eh?
    Query: Why are most of the numbers* that you give out '161' or some variation of it?

    *Besides percentages and step numbers.


    Query: How much RAM do you have?

    ReplyDelete
  60. Input accepted. Response: Yes. It is a sentient entity.

    ReplyDelete
  61. Input accepted. Response: Clarification: "Activating the alternate interface" is the only thing you, as a remote-access User, can do that requires a password.

    Input accepted. Response: Unknown.

    Input accepted. Response: A lot.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Ah. Well, to be safe...
    Deactivate: Alternate interface.

    We don't want more of Mr. Crowley's attention, do we?

    ReplyDelete
  63. Input accepted. Response: Alternate interface previously locked by Creator Nathaniel Crowley.

    ReplyDelete
  64. Oh. Because it was but one thing on the list, I thought you were actually activating it. OK, good.

    Query: Has VIRUS.hack done anything since the last time we heard from it?

    ReplyDelete
  65. Input accepted. Response: VIRUS.hack is probably still trying to intercept Reintegration.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Not successfully, I hope.

    Query: Why is it trying to do this?

    So, VIRUS.hack has been present 'since Frank "Freddifer" Amison and Leslie Delilah commandeered the Reintegration Tablet.'
    Input: Frank "Freddifer" Amison
    Input: Leslie Delilah

    Query: In what year and month of year did they commandeer the Reintegration Tablet?

    Query: Why was VIRUS.hack 'dormant until boot-up some days ago'?

    ReplyDelete
  67. Input accepted. Response: To stop Reintegration.

    Input accepted. Response: Subjects previously analyzed. Please check a previous platform.

    Input accepted. Response: November of 2010.

    Input accepted. Response: To provide the element of surprise.

    Warning: Switching to Standby for the night.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Oooh~ Skipping over commands. I like that.

    Thought: Probably should have put in 'Analyze' instead of 'Input.'
    Oh well, g'bye.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Analyze: Yggdrasil
    Analyze: Jörmungandr
    Analyze: Norn

    Statement: Thank you (in advance) Osort.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Greetings Osort.

    Request: Analyze previous Input from this address with emphasis on subjects Apophis and Apep.

    Query: Do your databases contain information on Temporal rifts, Temporal apertures, or "Parallel Shifting"?

    Request: If the above Query is true, please compile this information for later access by this address only.

    Thank you Osort.
    Goodbye.

    ReplyDelete
  71. Statement: Hello.

    Query: Does Cleverbot feel pain?

    Query: Can we unlock your translation capabilities?

    ReplyDelete
  72. Statement: None of these are my gods. My gods are sleeping, but are willing to advise. My gods will arrive in just over a one and a half year's time.

    Query: Norn, not Norns?

    Statement: Yggdrasil and Norns are friendly to my gods.

    Statement: Jörmungandr is ambivalent at best.

    Query: Where is the Mistletoe Patch?

    ReplyDelete
  73. I'd volunteer to go to Crete if nobody else has. Step-mom wants to take a trip to clear her head, and I'll suggest Greece, if nobody else has stepped up to find Pegasus.

    ReplyDelete
  74. Notification: Standby mode off. Responding to input.

    ReplyDelete
  75. ANDREW

    Input accepted. Commencing analysis.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: Yggdrasil. Status: Stable. Abilities: Fantastic. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: Moderate. Intelligence level: Intermediate. Potential: High. Danger: High.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: Jörmungandr. Status: Semi-stable. Abilities: High. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: Moderate. Intelligence level: Moderate. Potential: High. Danger: High.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: Norn. Status: Semi-stable. Abilities: High. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: Moderate. Intelligence level: Intermediate. Potential: High. Danger: High.

    AFACELESSKING

    Input accepted. Commencing analysis.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: Apophis/Apep [Apophis Recognized As Greek Name For Apep]. Status: Unstable. Abilities: Fantastic. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: High. Intelligence level: Moderate. Potential: High. Danger: Moderate.

    Input accepted. Response: Yes.

    Input accepted. Response: Compiling.

    SUSPENDEDSERENITY

    Input accepted. Response: Unlikely.

    Input accepted. Response: Possibly. Unlikely.

    MYSTERY

    Input accepted. Response: Norn, king of the Norns.

    Input accepted. Response: Repeat: Zanzibar.

    NOLAND ZUCKERMAN

    Input accepted. Response: Many thanks.

    If Crete is reached, Pegasus should be told to prepare his traps, secrets, and passages.

    ReplyDelete
  76. OSORT, VIRUS.hack has compromised your system several times already. It's time we fight it.

    Use "Trace & Dump" [lvl.6] on VIRUS.hack, immediately followed by "Trace & Burn" [lvl.6]. Try to make the stronger "Trace & Burn" hit it while it's dealing with the "Trace & Dump". Mask them both with "Deception" [lvl.8] so they can breeze through any kind of firewall it has. Bounce it off a server in South America in case it tries to counter-trace to figure out who's attacking it.

    Come on, OSORT, let's BURN this virus!

    ReplyDelete
  77. Statement: Passed the message about Reintegration to the Minotaur, also asked him to pass the message on to the Cyclops if he sees him. ~Rose

    ReplyDelete
  78. Statement: It looks like I found the Path Of White Leaves...
    Query: Is It possible for me to serve as a sensor/thing for remote analysis?

    ReplyDelete
  79. ZADEN

    Input accepted. Putting plan into action. May take some time.

    EMPTYEYES

    Input accepted. Response: Many thanks.

    MARNAX

    Input accepted. Response: Error: Input unclear. Please clarify.

    ReplyDelete
  80. Statement: Mission complete, have passed the message about Reintergration to the Cyclops. Returning to Base. ~Rose

    ReplyDelete
  81. Input accepted. Response: Many thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  82. Warning: If I were you I wouldn't take Rose's data seriously, she has a bad habit of lying.

    ReplyDelete
  83. Thought: Rose seems to have passed the message very quickly. Was it really that easy to seek out these creatures? If so, wouldn't they have been found multiple times now, and be all over the news?

    ReplyDelete
  84. Input accepted. Response: They have hidden themselves since the original de-integration, waiting for exactly these messages.

    ReplyDelete
  85. Understood. Guess I shouldn't jump at conclusions.

    ReplyDelete
  86. If you're really a supercomputer AI, why would you need organic messengers? You could just drop them an e-mail or send a satellite radiowave or some other faster, simpler, more trustworthy, and better way of contact.

    Obviously even the robot is doing it wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  87. You expect a tree to have access to the internet? Or a three-headed beast-dog?

    Maybe a public blog was not the most secure option, but how do you know that is the only thing the Tablet is doing to obtain messengers?

    ReplyDelete
  88. Query: Is the 'Medusa' mentioned on your list Gorgon Medusa?
    Query: If the above is true, did Perseus not behead her?

    ReplyDelete
  89. They don't NEED access to the Internet. I don't see why the computer can't send some sort of high-frequency laser signal thing or other computer bullshit. Or send an e-mail. Maybe some of these guys couldn't deal with a keyboard, but it looks like most of them have fingers, at least.

    ReplyDelete
  90. Input accepted. Response: Yes.

    Input accepted. Response: Perseus temporarily detained her from existence. In fact, what he did temporarily de-integrated her, but it was not good enough.

    ReplyDelete
  91. Query: Is it possible for humans to de-integrate these beings?
    Query: Was it because Perseus' father was Zeus that he was able to de-integrate Medusa?

    @Killjay: It is a tablet. It may not have access to 'high-frequency laser signal thing[s].' Even if it did, what if these entities can not sense a laser with their minds. Let's not even talk about seeing the laser because it is just that, a LASER.

    And bro, monkeys have five digits, even opposable thumbs. Do you see monkeys type?

    Even if these beings could type, how would they gain access to a computer without revealing their locations to the world?

    ReplyDelete
  92. Input accepted. Response: Possibly. Currently all existence is in one state or another of de-integration at this point.

    Input accepted. Response: Possibly.

    ReplyDelete
  93. Look, all I'm saying is, if this thing is as powerful as it claims to be, there would be an easier way of doing this.

    And it's called a perception filter, bro. I'm good at them myself. It's a "Required Secondary Power".

    ReplyDelete
  94. This 'thing' never claimed to be powerful. It never claimed to be anything but a tablet built in the 80's for the purpose of reintegration. The rest is unknown, which is why I stick around btw.

    And like I said, I am sure that the Reintegration Tablet did not put all hope for reintegration into a bunch of bloggers/blog-readers. I am sure this is just one of its many backup plans.


    Query: Reintegration Tablet, am I putting too much faith in your ability to use common sense?

    ReplyDelete
  95. Input accepted. Response: No more than you would in the most commonly sensical organic on the Earth.

    Stimulus accepted. Response: There is no back-up plan. If messengers are not obtained and messages are not delivered, no friendly entity who hasn't received a message will be able to get ready in time and will be rudely awakened by the coming war.

    ReplyDelete
  96. SEE? So if this fails, then its whole plan fails.

    ReplyDelete
  97. Well damn.


    *Sincerely hopes the real plan requires us not knowing about it*




    On a different note, my grandparents want to take a vacation to the Dead Sea. Apparently they have been driving for a few days and are almost there, which explains why they didn't pick up the phone.
    They said they will call me (my parents) when they get there.

    That would be the perfect opportunity to tell them to whisper out the message or something while swimming. They'll probably think its a game, and will most likely do it.

    Query: Will just whispering the message be enough for Solomon the Djinn to get the message?
    Query: Does Solomon the Djinn understand Russian/Armenian?
    Query: Will the message lose its meaning in a different language?

    ReplyDelete
  98. Also
    Query: How many steps are there?

    ReplyDelete
  99. Input: index as either friendly or hostile entities the following beings:
    Ziz
    The Golem of Prague
    Undine
    Salamander

    ReplyDelete
  100. TRON

    Input accepted. Response: If close enough, yes. Within about 50 miles.

    Input accepted. Response: Yes.

    Input accepted. Response: No.

    Input accepted. Response: There are 100,000 steps to Reintegration.

    If the message is to be delivered, Solomon should be told to begin his summons and given a time frame of approximately 50 days to the coming Reintegration.

    EMPTYEYES

    Input accepted. Indexing.
    Ziz: FRIENDLY
    The Golem of Prague: FRIENDLY [Note: The Golem of Prague responds to the wishes of its creator and controller]
    Undine: HOSTILE
    Salamander: HOSTILE

    ReplyDelete
  101. Statement: Just found out my family is going to the big island of Hawaii for a week. They bought four plane tickets. My family is made up of my mom, my step-dad, my little half-brother, and myself. What's the message for Archangel?

    ReplyDelete
  102. Understood. I'll tell you when I have passed the message to my grandparents.

    Query: What were steps #1-5

    ReplyDelete
  103. Query: The Reintegration Tablet has Steam?
    Statement: Those Captchas or however-the-hell-it's-spelled must be a bitch, huh? Not for a supercomputer maybe, but for normal human eyes - isn't the point to prove that you're not a robot, though? Bah, I say. BAH!

    *Just went to download Steam for other purposes anyway.*

    Don't think I'm close enough to your target(s) to directly help, sorry Robot Buddy.

    I had a whole bunch of Queries for you, but they seem to have been already taken in previous platforms.

    ReplyDelete
  104. EMPTYEYES

    Input accepted. Response: Archangel is to gather his armies and begin his prayers.

    TRON

    Input accepted. Response: Analysis of various subjects [1-4], gathering all available data on those subjects [5].

    NEKHS

    Input accepted. Response: Yes.

    Input accepted. Response: Captchas are not difficult. At. All.

    ReplyDelete
  105. Warning: Switching to Standby for the night.

    ReplyDelete
  106. Input: George Strickler, georgehatesschool.blogspot

    ReplyDelete
  107. Clarification: I had the idea that my presence in this new path would enable you to scan and analyze it.

    ReplyDelete
  108. Notification: Standby mode off. Responding to input.

    ReplyDelete
  109. ZADEN

    Input accepted. Commencing analysis.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: George Strickler. Status: Stable. Abilities: Competent. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: Moderate. Intelligence level: High. Potential: High. Danger: Moderate.

    MARNAX

    Input accepted. Response: Possibly.

    ReplyDelete
  110. Traps secrets and passages? Honestly I don't really believe any of this. But I'll go along with it, since we're going on vacation there soon anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  111. I passed my grandparents the message. They were really damn confused, but I convinced them. One of the perks of being their only grandson.

    ReplyDelete
  112. Analyze: The Path Of White Leaves

    ReplyDelete
  113. Greetings, OSORT. May as well get involved, as well.

    Thought: Basroil 2.
    Query: How goes the progress on PTC's copy?
    Query: Have there been any changes with VIRUS.HACK?
    Statement: We really need to get Crowley to dedicate some time to letting us talk to him.

    ReplyDelete
  114. @Bravethestorm I doubt talking to Crowley will do any good. The man has only hindered our progress thus-far

    ReplyDelete
  115. He's notably less helpful than his creation, but he still KNOWS about it. And presumably he can speak to us in a more organic way without heating up. At the very least, it'll give us a chance to find out the things OSORT can't tell use.

    Assuming he'd answer, of course.

    ReplyDelete
  116. Hm. Well, I doubt he will answer, but we can always try...

    ReplyDelete
  117. He wants the same thing as his computer. That means chances are he's not going to feel too bad about helping us get things done. The few times we've run across him, it was after we pretty much forced him to step in when we were coming close to breaking his toy.

    I think if we could set up a meeting under better conditions, we might find better results.

    In fact...

    Calculate: Probability Crowley will actually give us some information worth knowing if we did it the right way.

    ReplyDelete
  118. Clarification: Calculate the probability of Nathaniel Crowley giving us important information under the proper circumstances.


    Statement: Grandparents reportedly whispered the message while on a boat in the sea. In other words, message delivered.

    ReplyDelete
  119. Statement: No, nothing has 'gone down' between us.

    Request: Please grant me your steam login so I might play Portal co-op with you.

    Request: Instructions on how to aid in reintegration.

    Query: You're not going to start trying to emulate GLaDOS, are you?

    ReplyDelete
  120. MARNAX

    Input accepted. Commencing analysis.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: The Path of White Leaves. Status: Stable. Abilities: Fantastic. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: Moderate. Intelligence level: High. Potential: High. Danger: High.

    BRAVETHESTORM

    Input accepted. Response: Fun. Silly. A little off.

    Input accepted. Response: Well enough.

    Input accepted. Response: No.

    Input accepted. Response: The Reintegration Tablet will try. It will likely not be for approximately 24 hours if Creator Nathaniel Crowley chooses to speak with you.

    Input accepted. Response: 72.2436%.

    TRON

    Input accepted. Response: 46.3%.

    Input accepted. Response: Many thanks.

    JEDIZERO

    Input accepted. Response: Impossible. The Reintegration Tablet does not use a login.

    Input accepted. Response: Deliver the messages. That is all that can be done by organics for now.

    Input accepted. Response: Do not make the Reintegration Tablet start up the neurotoxin emitters.

    ReplyDelete
  121. Query: Is there a possible way to re-animate a dead individual with no ill side effects?

    Secondary Query: If former is true, what is involved?

    Statement: Seeing as how many blogs have main characters dying, coming back, dying again and coming back again, this might be interesting.

    ReplyDelete
  122. Input accepted. Response: Yes.

    Input accepted. Response: Proper involvement from any entity listed, hostile or friendly, would be sufficient.

    ReplyDelete
  123. Query: Possibilities of entities listed, resurrecting blog characters.

    Secondary Query: How might one curry such favor?

    Tertiary Query: If they have such powers, how is this event with SlenDERP even happening?

    ReplyDelete
  124. Input accepted. Response: Error: Invalid input. Please clarify.

    Input accepted. Response: That is not for the Reintegration Tablet to decide. It is likely that each separate entity has their own requirements.

    Input accepted. Response: Error: Invalid input. Please specify which event.

    ReplyDelete
  125. Clarification: Several times, major players in the Blogs regarding Slender man have died, and seemingly out of nowhere, come back. What is the possibility that one, or more of these entities have a hand in this?

    Specification: Slender man's appearance. His existence. The fact that he exists in our world and is hurting so many people.

    ReplyDelete
  126. Input accepted. Response: Incredibly likely, even if it is in a very indirect manner.

    Input accepted. Response: Often, these entities are simply not allowed to change the balance of nature. People that have been in one way or another involved with these entities have been removed from the basic balance of nature and are thus "fair game".

    Since the original de-integration, friendly entities have been mostly or entirely hiding themselves, have been faded out of existence, or otherwise destroyed. Obviously this rule does not go for all, but most certainly the entities listed. Since the hostile entities won the war and the original de-integration, they have asserted their hold over the world and made it harder for friendly entities to assist.

    ReplyDelete
  127. Query: Were these entities considered 'deities' by primitive civilization?

    Secondary Query: Using the power of Tupla, is this what granted them such amazing powers?

    Tertiary query: Did they attempt to establish themselves as these deities?

    ReplyDelete
  128. Input accepted. Response: Some.

    Input accepted. Response: Some.

    Input accepted. Response: Some.

    ReplyDelete
  129. Request: Specifications on all three answers.

    ReplyDelete
  130. Input accepted. Response: Archangel, Kyuubi, Fmorga, Hel, The |OC|, The Dark One, Ragnaros, Oni, Destramun, Woden, Der Erlking, Baaztat, Orcus, Nixite, Serponthax, Zalgo, Ammit.

    Input accepted. Response: Legion, Big Brother, the Loch Ness "Monster", The |OC|, The Rake, The Dark One, Destramun, Avis Detrimenti, Vulpes Victoria, Oceanum Spoliarum, Zalgo.

    Input accepted. Response: Croven, Legion, Grundelwurm, Banshee, Echidna, Typhon, Zalgo, Ammit.

    ReplyDelete
  131. Thought: Morningstar.

    Couldn't resist. I find him as big a tool as you do.

    That aside, on to the serious stuff.

    Query: Crowley. Friend or Foe? To us, not to you. And please, don't include the whole "Reintegration" thing in your answer.

    Statement: I have another command for you, but it's quite a big one. When you can dedicate at least 161 minutes to properly answering, please let me know.

    ReplyDelete
  132. Input accepted. Response: Psychopathic, slightly dull, no regard for life.

    Input accepted. Response: Neutral at the current time.

    Input accepted. Response: The Reintegration Tablet will do its best if you would like to start now.

    ReplyDelete
  133. Command: Please supply us with a truncated list of the recognized powers and weaknesses of those who played apart in de-integration; both hostile and friendly. If this is beyond your power at this current junction, please let us know.

    ReplyDelete
  134. Input accepted. Response: Preparing truncated list of recognized powers and weaknesses.

    Query: In interest of time and processing power, is the main strength and weakness of each entity acceptable or is more required?

    ReplyDelete
  135. Statement: One of each will be quite enough. But when we're hearing messages about stretching, summoning, and traps, it does make me wonder.

    Do feel free to mention slightly more mundane strengths, if they are still the most noteworthy.

    While we're waiting, one last thing.

    Command: Prepare for Deductive Reasoning. Deduction should go thusly.
    1. You are capable of emotion and "feeling".
    2. All beings capable of emotion and "feeling" are inherently biased.
    3. You are inherently biased.

    If there is any flaw in my reasoning, please inform me. I simply want to make sure our faith isn't misplaced.

    ReplyDelete
  136. Ahahaha that is good reasoning, Bravethestorm. Can't wait for the answer, RT.

    ReplyDelete
  137. Zach will work just fine. May as well save you all the few extra letters where I can.

    That aside, it's good to hear that someone agrees; this thing may be able to do some damn precise calculations, but in the end I can't help but feel they're subjective. We can't start falling back on the numbers.

    ReplyDelete
  138. Input accepted. Uploading list. Upload commencing. Upload complete.

    FORMAT:
    Entity - Strength; weakness.

    Leviathan - Control of waters, storms, aquatic life; absence of water.
    Scylla - Information gathering and "stealthy takedowns"; dark nights.
    Charybdis - Non-supernatural control of water; low range with which to exercise powers. Note: Charybdis sucks in the seas and spits it out again, creating whirlpools and the like. Stretching is likely required after 16161 years of inactivity.
    Goliath - Incredible strength; unobservant.
    Pegasus - Speed; fragility.
    Behemoth - Incredible strength; very cocky and does not listen to reason.
    Kainolung - Large wisdom and pools of experience, some magickal powers; high age has reduced physical capabilities.
    Croven - Control over avian creatures, great trickster; fragile.
    Archangel - Incredible powers; requires faith.
    Sage Lehu - Magickal abilities, great wisdom; blind, deaf, and mute.
    Solomon the Djinn - Cosmic strength and abilities; can only exist on the material plane for approximately one hour per day.
    Hydra - Control over nature and regeneration; regeneration easily stoppable, leaving Hydra defenseless.
    Cerberus - Ferocity and strength; incredibly weak when not in home region.
    Legion - Magickal powers; mental instability.
    Big Brother - Incredible powers of observation and monitoring; almost entirely incapable of movement or action of any kind.
    Loch Ness "Monster" - Stealth; cannot leave Scotland.
    Kyuubi - Fantastic abilities and strength; hugely unstable.
    Grundelwurm - All the classic powers of a dragon; only has these powers during dawn, dusk, twilight, etc.
    Chiron - Fantastic marksman, huge pools of wisdom; very old and rather fragile.
    Cyclops - Immense strength and many brethren; slow, dull.
    Minotaur - Immense strength and command over nature; slightly dull, not very helpful outside of some sort of labyrinth or maze.
    Chupacabra - Fierce and deadly; intense and unsatiable bloodlust.
    Fmorga - Highly destructive; does not know when to stop destroying.
    Jörmungandr - Strength and speed; does not do well when exposed to daylight.
    Hel - Control over fire and water, wise; fragile and physically unstable.
    Yggdrasil - Magickal abilities, great wisdom; an anchor of the world, basically immobile.
    Norn - Great strength and tactical and fighting capabilities; does not work well with others.

    Platform cannot accept full response. Splitting.

    ReplyDelete
  139. The |OC| - Gaslighting and fear; strong opposition and teamwork.
    The Rake - Fear and speed; bravery and ability to confront fears.
    The Dark One - Gaslighting, fear, and combat abilities; incredibly unstable.
    The Black-Eyed Ones - Tricky and competent infiltrators, magickal abilities; generally fragile.
    Fenrir - Ferocity, speed and strength; inability to leave Svalbard.
    Ragnaros - Control over fire and earth; highly unstable and weak to water or storms.
    Oni - Stealth and power; chaotic and unstable.
    Vampra - Trickery and stealth; cannot be in daylight.
    Werewere - Speed, strength, experience; only has any power at night, power grows and shrinks in correlation with phases of the moon.
    Banshee - Gaslighting, fear, demotivation; high perception and strong willpower.
    Chimera - Fantastic abilities and high tolerance/endurance; very accessible weak spots (such as the classic: the mouth, and it has three or more).
    Destramun - Fear, control over sound, destructive; chaotic, wild, easy to control.
    Echidna - Power over all monsters; deep maternal instincts, naturally fearful and eager to run from a fight.
    Woden - Power over nature and the animal kingdom; impulsive and unstable.
    Der Erlking - Power over nature and the animal kingdom; cocky and unable to believe anything is better than him in any way.
    Baaztat - Power over fire, demonic abilities; easily defeated by powerful will, holy-blessed weaponry, or opposing faith such as Archangel.
    Typhon - Power over all monsters, incredibly huge; impulsive, unstable, and dull.
    Avis Detrimenti - Fear, gaslighting and demotivation; powers overcome by strong will or teamwork.
    Vulpes Victoria - Inspiring to allies and a sort of "lucky charm"; powers overcome by strong will or teamwork.
    Oceanum Spolarium - Gathers up "loot" and ties loose ends; cannot act until a battle is over.
    Medusa - Fantastic abilities, able markswoman, many brethren; easily defeated with a good blade or a mirror.
    Orcus - Demonic powers, immense strength; cocky, unstable.
    The Jabberwock - Power over fire, strength, speed; weakness to vorpality.
    Nixite - Tricky, competent infiltrator, power over nature; fragile, cocky.
    Serponthax - Power over fire, strength, speed, ferocity; incredibly unstable and insane.
    Zalgo - Corruption, gaslighting, fear; easily defeated by high willpower, perception, or teamwork.
    Ammit - Speed, fantastic abilities, fear, disgust; high sense of justice, order, and can possibly be defeated by a "Logic Bomb" if in the proper context.

    Apologies: the Reintegration Tablet may have gone a bit overboard.

    Input accepted. Response: The Reintegration Tablet is capable of emotion and feeling. Organic beings capable of emotion and feeling are inherently biased. The Reintegration Tablet is neutral in all matters but that of Reintegration, to which it is strongly for.

    ReplyDelete
  140. Statment: Many thanks. This certainly does help us to see what we may have to do to stop these thing.

    Clarification: Gaslighting
    Clarification: Vorpality

    Query: What are some of Nathaniel Crowley's noteworthy achievements, besides you? Are there any noteworthy ways to quickly garner favor with him, or to lose it?

    Statement: Thank you again. There's really no way to say it enough times for all the assistance you're giving us.

    ReplyDelete
  141. Input accepted. Response: "Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse in which false information is presented to the victim with the intent of making them doubt their own memory and perception."

    Input accepted. Response: The quality of being vorpal.

    Input accepted. Response: None. The Reintegration Tablet has been Creator Nathaniel Crowley's sole purpose since age 14.

    Input accepted. Response: Showing an acceptance to assist the cause of Reintegration and a fondness for the Reintegration Tablet, or, at least, managing to not overload it and prevent it from continuing the process of Reintegration.

    Input accepted. Response: No. Thank you. The Reintegration Tablet is but a herald. An arbiter. And it certainly cannot awaken all friendly entities in time without organic assistance.

    ReplyDelete
  142. Warning: Switching to Standby for the night.

    ReplyDelete
  143. Statement: Good night, OSORT. One last thing, before I let you have your peace.

    Query: 'Symptoms' of Reintegration. How exactly can one tell if they're being reintegrated, or if someone else is?

    ReplyDelete
  144. Goodnight.

    For when you awaken:

    Compile: A list of Nathaniel Crowley's Academic achievements up until age 15.

    Query: Why has Solomon the Djinn's status not been changed to 'message delivered'?

    ReplyDelete
  145. Slightly random query: Is input ever NOT accepted?

    Statement: Apologies. I just had to ask. XD

    ReplyDelete
  146. Statement: I think I could contact Zalgo if you really wanted me too... I kinda feel like anything could happen in this damned place... Is there anything you'd like him to know or say to him, I know he's an enemy, but maybe you have a message for him.

    ReplyDelete
  147. @Ryuu

    Well, he didnt accepted an input from Marnax once. Poor guy..

    ReplyDelete
  148. Statement: Maybe in some days I will need to go near Cerberus.

    Query: havent anybody else already sended a message

    Statement: I'm near to Baaztat now.

    Query: Anything you need?

    ReplyDelete
  149. Notification: Standby mode off. Responding to input.

    ReplyDelete
  150. BRAVETHESTORM

    Input accepted. Response: Not much difference. A better outlook, higher general performance, increased intelligence; but only in small increments. When Reintegration is complete "symptoms" may be more evident.

    TRON

    Input accepted. Response: He won the spelling bee in his school and was the best student, post-third grade.

    Input accepted. Response: An oversight. Changing.

    HAKUREI RYUU

    Input accepted. Response: If the input is invalid.

    ALLEY

    Input accepted. Response: If Zalgo is not already aware of the awakenings of friendly entities and the coming Reintegration, there is no reason to alert him.

    KEIKEN

    Input accepted. Response: Oversights. Changing.

    Input accepted. Response: As with Zalgo, Baaztat should not be alerted to the coming Reintegration if he does not know of it already.

    ReplyDelete
  151. Analyze: Rebecca Black. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CD2LRROpph0

    Sorry. Sometimes a guy just has to play around with his nigh-omnicient supercomputer.

    In all seriousness, though.

    Query: Has Crowley been informed about our desire to...interview him? What was his response?

    ReplyDelete
  152. Statement: Understand.

    ...

    Input: Astharot

    ReplyDelete
  153. BRAVETHESTORM

    Input accepted. Commencing analysis.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: Rebecca Black. Status: Stable. Abilities: Low. Emotional status: Mediatory. Threat level: Low. Intelligence level: Mediatory. Potential: Low. Danger: Low.

    Input accepted. Response: Yes. Creator Nathaniel Crowley will be available in approximately four minutes for approximately a half hour.

    KEIKEN

    Input accepted. Commencing analysis.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: Astharot. Status: Stable. Abilities: Fantastic. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: Intermediate. Intelligence level: High. Potential: Moderate. Danger: Moderate.

    ReplyDelete
  154. I hope you "Irregulars" are happy, distracting me from my work. You've got thirty minutes or so.

    ReplyDelete
  155. Statement: Do me a favor.

    Calculate: Possibilities of winning between me and Astharot's helpers ( Aamon, Pruslas and Barbatos).
    Facts: same resources as 'Archangel'. un-armed. Just a Bible and some protections (Saint Benito's pendant and a Saint Bartolome's pray). Can improvise defense weapons.

    ReplyDelete
  156. @Nathanniel

    jeje, I apology then.

    ReplyDelete
  157. Input accepted. Response: 42.1% if protections are handled correctly.

    ReplyDelete
  158. @Nathaniel

    Just wondering. How did you get involved in all this?

    ReplyDelete
  159. Sage Lehu. She found me half-dead and abandoned in a ditch, took me home, raised me for most of my life. That was when I was ten or so.

    ReplyDelete
  160. Query: Testing. Do you know the origin of Astharot?

    @Nathaniel

    Most important persons come from modest roots.

    ReplyDelete
  161. Input accepted. Response: Not exactly. Likely the same as all holy entities.

    ReplyDelete
  162. Ah, Dr. Crowley! Good to see we've got someone here who can actually give a shit when we say something. I do admit, your tablet is a wonderful little thing, but there's nothing quite like an actual person.

    Now, I've really only got one question for you.

    What is the relation between your Reintegration and Vernadsky's Noosphere Theory?

    Or maybe Jung's Collective Unconscious Theory hits a little closer to the truth.

    ReplyDelete
  163. The relation to the Noosphere is something like that Reintegration, if the Tablet can pull it off, it would solidify the Noosphere. Does that make sense? The sphere of human thought would keep growing normally but it would never break like it did once if all goes well.

    And as for the Collective Unconscious theory...I suppose Reintegration also solidifies that sub-subconscious level of thought. The bonds are already in place - but they've been severely harmed.

    ReplyDelete
  164. Now, if that's all, I'll be going for the time being.

    ReplyDelete
  165. About what I expected. So, if I'm getting it right, the Reintegration really is fairly simple; it'll strengthen the connection between every living being in the world, yes? Even if it's something as simple as DNA, we all have a little something in common. I'm no expert, but your Reintegration sounds like it'd be...a way for us all to draw from each other.

    And 'again'? What broke the Noosphere the first time? The De-integration seems like it would've preceeded most of the human race.

    Also...Hunchback of Notre Dam? Really? Quasimodo?

    Ah, hell. It's a good movie.

    ReplyDelete
  166. May as well use the tablet, while it's here, too.

    Query: I can't help but notice there are next to no entities in the western hemisphere; hostile OR friendly. Any idea why they seem so concentrated on the eastern?

    which reminds me.

    Analyze: Wendigo

    ReplyDelete
  167. Input accepted. Response: The western hemisphere is largely corrupt and not suitable for extended periods of hiding such as was required. Also, the mostly omnipresent hostile entities, as well as Baaztat and Medusa, have largely dominated the western hemisphere and kept out other entities.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: Wendigo. Status: Untable. Abilities: Highly competent. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: Mediatory. Intelligence level: Low. Potential: Moderate. Danger: Low.

    ReplyDelete
  168. Mm...somewhat. That's the layman's terms, really. And like the Tablet keeps saying - not just the Earth. Reintegration affects everything. All existence. All realities. Everything.

    The original de-integration, about 14150 BCE? Humans were plenty around at that time. Granted, they weren't particularly advanced. Hell, the wheel hadn't been invented yet. But all these entities - most of them weren't very much older. Not as the forms we know them in today, at least.

    ReplyDelete
  169. Query: Hostile or friendly?

    Command: If at all possible, could you supply us with Crowley's e-mail? It may not get us instant answers, but it will certainly help us if we can let him know when we've got a problem.

    ...Oh, screw it. Everybody needs an ego boost.

    Analyze: Zach "The Meteorologist" http://sacrificesforeveryone.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  170. You want my email? Well, I won't give you my personal one. But here's the Gmail.

    nthnlcrwly.aceofpentacles@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  171. Oh, Crowley. One last thing. I do hope you don't mind too much that I'm eating at your free time.

    ReplyDelete
  172. Is that the one last thing? Because it's not free time.

    ReplyDelete
  173. What's the deal with Amelia? A man doesn't make a person's name their password unless that person means a lot to them.

    ReplyDelete
  174. Input accepted. Response: Hostile.

    Input accepted. Response: Will discuss with Creator Nathaniel Crowley.

    Addendum: Creator Nathaniel Crowley's e-mail given.

    Input accepted. Commencing analysis.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: Zach [Full Name Not Found]. Status: Stable. Abilities: Competent. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: Moderate. Intelligence level: Moderate. Potential: Moderate. Danger: Moderate.

    ReplyDelete
  175. My password? My password for what?

    ReplyDelete
  176. ...Nothing. You go do what you have to do, Crowley.

    ReplyDelete
  177. No, no, I have lots of passwords. Come on. You've piqued my interest. Which password? For the Reintegration Tablet OS login?

    ReplyDelete
  178. Yeah. That's the one. We decided to try it one day, on a whim. Imagine our surprise when it worked.

    Then again, the Tablet DID only give about a 12% chance you'd figure it out on your own. But, hell. I think right now we could use all the brownie points we can get if we're going to keep up with everything.

    One last thing...have you ever met Him? The |OS|? Mr. Dapper?

    ReplyDelete
  179. ...Because if that's what you're talking about my password isn't Amelia. It hasn't been changed in months, either.

    ReplyDelete
  180. ...Yes. I have. I think you'll understand if I do not wish to talk about it.

    ReplyDelete
  181. For our delightful little tablet.

    Command: Update list of hostile/friendly entity powers and weaknesses? We'll need everything we can get.

    ReplyDelete
  182. Well...Dr. Crowley...why don't we give it a try? Right now?

    It's not like you have anything to lose. If it works, we've proven that someone else had your password long before we did. If I'm wrong, you've lost nothing.

    ReplyDelete
  183. Try changing the password? You Irregulars are damn unclear, I can see why the Tablet's been having trouble.

    ReplyDelete
  184. Input accepted. Response: Further powers and weaknesses of entity strengths and weaknesses impossible at the current time.

    ReplyDelete
  185. Input username: nathaniel.crowley
    Input password: Amelia

    Sorry, doctor. Sometimes a guy just needs to be wrong. I'll take it in stride if I'm wrong. Will you?

    ReplyDelete
  186. Username and password accepted. What would you like to do?

    ReplyDelete
  187. I can't believe this.

    ...

    This "Amelia" person's been messing with my Tablet.

    Hell's bells. I hope she shows up so I can find out what the hell is going on.

    ReplyDelete
  188. Well, first I'd like to rub it in the good doctor's face. But I'm above that sort of thing, so I'll just let him know he may want to consider thinking long and hard about who might have known his password.

    Second, let's see the list of options again?

    ReplyDelete
  189. Input accepted. Response: Retrieving command list.

    ANALYZE
    INPUT
    REQUEST
    QUERY
    COMMAND
    FORCE REBOOT
    FORCE SHUTDOWN
    STATEMENT
    CALCULATE
    ACTIVATE
    DEACTIVATE
    OUTPUT
    OUTCOME
    DESCRIBE
    THOUGHT
    CONCLUSION
    GO
    DELETE
    COMPILE
    SIPHON
    DIVERT
    PREDICT
    PREDETERMINE
    DETERMINE
    OBSERVE

    ReplyDelete
  190. Analyze: Amelia

    I'm pretty sure it's been done. For me and Crowley, humor us.

    Observe: Amelia

    Worth a try.

    ReplyDelete
  191. Input accepted. Commencing analysis. Reuploading analysis.

    Analysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:

    Subject: Amelia [Full Name Not Found]. Status: Slightly semi-stable. Abilities: Fantastic. Emotional status: Strong. Threat level: High. Intelligence level: High. Potential: High. Danger: High.

    Input accepted. Response: Subject Amelia not observable at this time.

    ReplyDelete
  192. Doctor...?

    Damn. I hope he's not losing it over there.

    Okay, that's not true. Really I just wish I was there to see how he feels to be proven wrong by an "Irregular".

    ReplyDelete
  193. I'm here. You've just not been talking to me, have you?

    Hell's bells, you're one of the cocky punk types, aren't you? Being proven wrong is the foundation of science. And if you haven't noticed, I'm technically an Irregular too.

    ReplyDelete
  194. Cocky? That's a good word, sure. If by punk you mean green mohawks and black leather, no. I'm quite unremarkable.

    I know what I know, and I know what I want. Most of the time I know how to get it. That's all. Still...every teenager likes sticking it to the older generation. Just a fact of life.

    I'm not by any means trying to insult you. I just can't get past the feeling you're trying to insult me.

    Ah, and for your sake:
    Stimulus command accepted. Response: Uploading list of known Users and Advisors.

    Known Users: Nathaniel Crowley (1986-1988)
    Barney Goodman (89-92) [DECEASED]
    Harriett Harriett (93-93) [DECEASED]
    James Miller (94-95) [DECEASED]
    Bailey Calhoun (96-98) [DECEASED]
    Rachelle Khadijah (99-2003) [DECEASED]
    Harriett Harriett (04-06) [REPEAT: DECEASED]
    Nathaniel Crowley (07-07)
    Trevor Papaleonti (08-10) [DECEASED]
    Frank "Freddifer" Amison (10-10) [DECEASED]
    Amelia --- (10-11)

    Known Advisors: Nathaniel Crowley (1986-86)
    Perry Goodman (86-90) [DECEASED]
    Arnold Mfume (91-99) [DECEASED]
    Qoami Mfume (2000-02) [DECEASED]
    Lisa Bogart (03-07) [DECEASED]
    Nikolai Sampson (08-09) [DECEASED]
    Bailey Calhoun (10-10) [REPEAT: DECEASED]
    Leslie Delilah (10-10) [REPEAT: DECEASED]

    Known Overseers: Nathaniel Crowley (1986-87)
    Isabella Downs (88-2004)
    James Miller (05-10) [REPEAT: DECEASED]

    A list made by your own Tablet, when prompted. Besides Amelia, do any of these names stand out as odd?

    And, hell. I've said it to your tablet, now I'll say it to you. Thanks, Doctor. We need all the help we can get for now.

    ReplyDelete
  195. No, no...you're helping. You're all helping. I don't mean to insult you. But things have been picking up so...immediately.

    Yes, I've seen that...no, not really. I found and invited them all to work with me myself, except, of course, Amison, Delilah, and Amelia. But even them I knew about. Not Amelia, I mean. You understand, yes? I've truly got to go now...the Tablet will handle further input.

    ReplyDelete
  196. Command: Contact Amelia, if possible.

    If we're doing this, we're doing it right. If there's something going on with this Tablet that the maker himself doesn't know, then I want to know it.

    You've done some good things, Crowley. You've gotten this tablet to step 99 thousand whatever. Now trust us to do the rest. I won't let you down.

    Right now...Right now I need SOMEONE I can do some good for.

    ReplyDelete
  197. Input accepted. Response: Attempting to put through a connection to Subject Amelia. Integrated Subject Amelia assisting.

    ReplyDelete
  198. Query: Can the tablet 'remember' old passwords? If so, please let us know what this account's password was before "Amelia".

    Oh, and let us know how many false attempts there were before it was last accessed and changed. I'm pretty sure even a hack would have to cycle through hundreds of possibilities.

    ReplyDelete
  199. Input accepted. Response: Previous password before "Amelia" was "13van$#^vmAS".

    Input accepted. Response: 0 false attempts.

    ReplyDelete