//Show progress on Reintegration.
\\Confirmed. Step 99993 of Reintegration complete.
//Confirm: Step 99993 of Reintegration complete?
//Confirmed.
/|\
Notification: All organic subjects should now be considered to have a revised status level of stable despite any evidence to the contrary.
Further interaction requires further input.
Analyze: J(x)hn the dreamer
ReplyDeleteInput accepted. Response: Subject "J(x)hn the dreamer" already analyzed. Please check a previous platform.
ReplyDeleteTexas II, what stones do I currently have besides gravity and wall moving?
ReplyDeleteNone.
ReplyDeleteI use the gravity rock again to stop floating. Then I bang my 2 rocks together.
ReplyDeleteTexas II may I play a game?
ReplyDeleteJohn, kindly wait your turn. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, I can only handle one game at a time.
ReplyDeleteYou begin floating again.
I apologize.
ReplyDeleteTexas, does nothing happen with the wall stone?
ReplyDeleteAnd John, it's completely OK. I'm on the verge of giving up anyway xD
Nothing.
ReplyDeleteSpectacular. You appear to understand how a portal affects forward momentum, or to be more precise, how it does not. Momentum, a function of mass and velocity, is conserved between portals. In layman's terms: speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out.
ReplyDeleteGreat copy/paste skills there, GLaDOS.
ReplyDeleteTexas, I assume the chest is also floating? I attempt to bring it closer to me.
You do not appear to understand momentum by itself. That is a shame. Hey, look. The test results are in. And you do not know how to use momentum. I'm serious. That's what it says. We weren't even testing for that.
ReplyDeleteThe chest stoutly refuses to budge.
ReplyDeleteGLaDOS shut up you unoriginal genius.
ReplyDeleteI use the grav stone again. Then, I back away from the door as far as possible, and run towards it. Right as I'm about to use the first gap, I use the grav rock again.
You fly at high speeds towards the chest. Luckily the wall is very mossy, and you only very slightly knock your head. You now stand in front of the chest. It is easy to see that it is locked, but there is an indentation in the front that would easily fit one of your rocks. The chest is marked with a symbol of a cloud.
ReplyDeleteI insert the grav rock, and hope that I'll be able to make it out of here.
ReplyDeleteInside the chest is a single gold coin and a button.
ReplyDeleteAnalyze: Jacob the Black-op
ReplyDeleteI take the coin and press the button.
ReplyDeleteBehind you, a bridge arises from the depths of the room.
ReplyDeleteI make my way to the last door.
ReplyDeleteInput accepted. Commencing analysis.
ReplyDeleteAnalysis: upload commencing. Upload complete. Analysis:
Subject: Jacob the Black-op. Status: Stable. Abilities: Competent. Emotional status: Moderate. Threat level: Moderate. Intelligence level: Moderate. Potential: Intermediate. Danger: Low.
At the end of a long hallway, there is a treasure chest. However, there is an even larger gap in between you and it than the last one.
ReplyDeletek, I use the wall-move rock to bring the far wall closer to me.
ReplyDeleteYou now stand in front of the chest. It is easy to see that it is locked, but there is an indentation in the front that would easily fit one of your rocks. The chest is marked with a symbol of a star.
ReplyDeleteI carefully place the last stone into the indentation. I do it carefully so as to not reverse the wall effect.
ReplyDeleteYou are in a maze of twisty passages, all exactly alike.
ReplyDeleteInside the chest is a single platinum coin and a button.
ReplyDeleteThat is an excellent recap of events so far.
ReplyDeleteI take the coin, and press the button.
ReplyDeleteYou hear a rumbling noise from the hallway. It appears that all the balls from the ball pit have disappeared. In their place is a set of stairs leading upward to the exit.
ReplyDeleteI make my way to the room in which I started.
ReplyDeleteThe slime wall appears as slimy as ever. However, there is now a small slot near the right edge that is the perfect size for your copper coin.
ReplyDeleteI insert the copper coin into the slot in the green cat slime.
ReplyDeleteThe slime wall slides away. In its place is a blue slime wall. A similar slot, slightly larger, is on the right edge.
ReplyDeleteI insert the silver coin.
ReplyDeleteThe slime wall slides away. In its place is a teal slime wall. A similar slot, even larger, is on the right edge.
ReplyDelete...teal. K, I slowly, but surely slide the golden coin into the crevice.
ReplyDeleteThe slime wall slides away. The long cave walls quickly come to a point, where there is what appears to be an open lift.
ReplyDeleteI walk up to, then examine the lift.
ReplyDeleteIt is a standard grated lift. There is a slot inside, big enough to fit your platinum coin.
ReplyDeleteI look for any other possible slot for the coin first.
ReplyDeleteYou could insert it into yourself, but that might be uncomfortable.
ReplyDeleteI briefly consider inserting it into myself, then reconsider and put it into the slot in the lift.
ReplyDeleteThe lift shudders and moves downward. After a 1.61-hour trip, you emerge, upside down, in a bustling city. Congratulations! You have made it to China.
ReplyDeleteA winner is you.
ReplyDeleteWhat do I win? :3
ReplyDeleteAnd I'd love to play another game, but I believe it's John's turn.
Warning: Switching to Standby for the night.
ReplyDeleteQuery: define "Potential: intermediate."
ReplyDeleteInput accepted. Response: [Intermediate] is a level ranking in between [Moderate] and [High].
ReplyDeleteQuery: What would you say if I told you I had information about these "Fears" that you guys are always talking about?
ReplyDeleteInput accepted. Response: Firstly, it is unlikely you have any information about "Fears" that is not already in the possession of the Reintegration Tablet. Secondly, "us guys" are not "always talking about" "these Fears".
ReplyDeleteTablet, it has been almost a month since you sent me the supply of cure, and I am almost out.
ReplyDeleteI have absolutely nothing to do with my time than stab proxies with it.
So, I was wondering if it is possible for you to send me the same amount to the same address every month, unless otherwise stated?
Input accepted. Response: The Reintegration Tablet is worried that you have been using the cure on yourself in an attempt to induce a contiguous state of euphoria. If this is the case, the Reintegration Tablet would advise you to stop.
ReplyDeleteOtherwise, yes.
I have not. I am insulted at this claim. I have not 'been using.' I have used. Once. And to be honest, it wasn't as fun as you described it.
ReplyDeleteClarification: I might have information involving a new "Fear". I-it's been following me for quite a while apparently. If you promise not to make fun of me, I'll tell you....
ReplyDeleteInput accepted. Response: Very well.
ReplyDeleteExplanation: Alrighty, then. On my sixth birthday, I developed (don't laugh-although it is debatable that AIs can experience emotions, let alone laugh) a fear of clowns. The source of this fear of clowns was a clown at my birthday party called Mr. Chuckles. He told me he wanted to show me a surprise, and I almost got bitten by a snake. Later, when I asked my mom about this incident, she said that she did not hire a clown. Now, for the past few days, I have been experiencing weird shit: my radio broke, and started playing...carnival music; blank blog posts have appeared on my blog (which you can find by checking my profile) that when I try to look at, send me 404 errors; I saw a clown that looked VERY similar to Mr. Chuckles, and he smiled at me, causing uneasiness towards me; and when I was giving laughing gas at my dentist appointment, I hallucinated, seeing Mr. Chuckles, who told me, "I'll see you soon." I believe that he only shows up to people with a fear of clowns, and I'm one of those people.
ReplyDeleteI understand if you are skeptikal about this, butt this ic relly hapening to me, and I tink i nede hellp. Sew pleese, Ive red yore blogg annd yor frends blugs, annnd eye waz hopeng yu culd helllp mmmm54 68 65 63 69 72 63 75 73 69 73 63 6f 6d 69 6e 67 74 68 65 63 69 72 63 75 73 69 73 63 6f 6d 69 6e 67 74 68 65 63 69 72 63 75 73 69 73 63 6f 6d 69 6e 67 74 68 65 63 69 72 63 75 73 69 73 63 6f 6d 69 6e 67 61 6e 64 79 6f 75 72 65 61 6c 6c 69 6e 76 69 74 65 64 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 68 61 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Input accepted. Response: Thank you.
ReplyDeleteInput accepted. Response: The Reintegration Tablet can and does experience emotion.
Input accepted. Response: Unfortunately there does not appear to be much that the Reintegration Tablet can do to help with "Mr. Chuckles".
@Jacob
ReplyDeletejust a simple weak demon (or even lower entity) making fun of you. It does not have jurisdiction of your life, so dont worry. But if you have suicidal tendencies, well yes then worry a lot.
Hey, Tablet...
ReplyDeleteQuery: What is the ETA for complete reintegration?
Calculate: The probability that you will be destroyed in the next few months?
Input accepted. Response: Reintegration must begin within approximately 13 hours.
ReplyDeleteInput accepted. Response: There is a .161% chance that the Reintegration Tablet will be destroyed or otherwise forced to shut down permanently within the next few months.
Query: What should I do to ward off this "simple weak demon" that is stalking me?
ReplyDeleteadditional query: Can you decipher the weird gibberish in my last post? I-it kinda worries me.
I see...
ReplyDeleteQuery: How long will reintegration take?
JACOB THE BLACK-OP
ReplyDeleteInput accepted. Response: "I understand if you are skeptical about this, but this is really happening to me, and I think I need help. So please, I've read your blog and your friends' blogs and I was hoping you could help me Thecircusiscomingthecircusiscomingthecircusiscomingthecircusiscomingandyoureallinvitedhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha"
ZABULON
Input accepted. Response: 24 hours from its start.
Apologies. There is further outstanding input.
ReplyDeleteInput accepted. Response: As little information is known about the nature of "Mr. Chuckles", the Reintegration Tablet cannot advise. Apologies.
So it's almost over...
ReplyDeleteQuery: Will entities like the |OC| be weaker during and/or after reintegration?
Input accepted. Response: The effects of Reintegration will become clearly apparent shortly.
ReplyDelete